Can you have too much “joie de vivre?”

Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Clause. No, Mimi, one can’t have too much “joie de vivre”. Can one have too much “joie de vivre”? This is French with a literal translation of “joy of life” but intended to mean one who has a real “zest for life”. You know those people, always happy, fun to be around, with an interest in everything and everyone. After the crash, Mimi made the comment, “ perhaps I had too much “joie de vivre”. I could not get that comment out of my head for days after the accident. I’d like to believe I have a lot of “joie de vivre”. Will it too cause calamity? Every day at home, I get up in the morning, open the front door and say “good morning world”. I’m a perpetually positive person. Always looking for a solution for any challenge encountered. I’ve been accused of being a “Chatty Cathy”, the doll from the 60’s; a cross between speedy Gonzales and a hampster that stays up all night, Pollyanna, or positive patty, or a Tasmanian devil. I hope all those comments were intended to be positive and I truly believe in living life fully and joyfully. I have finally put aside all the fears and for a year and a half have been living my dreams, and experiencing more joy in life than ever before. We had planned for this crazy adventure for almost 2 years. Mimi and I had purchased new bikes, I changed the gears and then changed the gears again on Blixen to optimize my chance of success on this 2700 mile adventure. We all bought new parts, tested them on a a variety of “test trips”, exchanged some of the gear, bought more, returned some. Handle bars, pedals with clips and flat on the other side, gears, crank sets, racks. We tested shorts, Gloves, front panniers, rear panniers, fork bags, handle bar bags, frame bags. We made food lists, parts lists, mileage lists. Lists of lists. (Maybe I have a problem!) We bought navigation devices and multiple navigation apps. We tested them, made wrong turns, read reviews and downloaded the maps. We got a search and rescue device. (Thank you Tara!!!) We had conference calls, discussed ideas, options, fears, timing, costs. We went on “test trips” to assess everything. We all quit our jobs……handled the American fear of the dreaded insurance that keeps so many from pursuing their dreams and on that treadmill of a 9-5, not daring to pursue their dreams. Finally we arrived at the start and set out. Embracing our fears, we were committed to trying, actually living our dream and not just dreaming. Mimi is a joy to be around. Her job, a long time nurse in the intensive care unit for traumatic injuries. She fills her role with love and compassion. She loves caring for people, has a beautiful, light, fun, spirit. Silly and happy, seeing the world with joy. Our first day was hard and we had some doubts. The second day we doubled our mileage and began to work on our systems. Packing. Unpacking. Best bear prevention measures. Cooking, bathing in the creeks or under the pumps. The third day we were strong, all felt capable, the bikes were running well, we felt great. The downhill miles near the end of the day were joyous and momentous. We were doing it-riding the Great Divide and LOVING it! We were compatible, each of us love activities of all kinds: hiking, biking, skiing, soccer, running, kayaking, etc etc and being immersed in nature, we were all experiencing the fullness of the emotion, broad smiles, whooping down the road with intermittent shouts of joy. The scenery was breath taking. The fear of bears was confirmed in reality with every scat pile. We were experiencing the full emotions and embracing “joie de vivre” that one exudes when achieving a dream! Previously we had also bought plane tickets, booked the air BNB, made arrangements to ship our bikes. It was a huge endeavor to plan, prepare and leave our “normal” lives for two and a half months. I love people who live life loudly, lovingly, bravely being themselves with little reservation. People who know themselves exude their own “joie de vivre”. Annie with the pink boa, Roger with the brain implant for his Parkinson’s to extend his ability to be active as long as possible. Nancy who says she is boring but Is happy and truly the most directly honest person I know. Since the crash, I’ve been contemplating joy and whether you can “have too much”. So many of us live fenced in lives. Some are Self imposed fences, where we fence in our emotions to protect our delicate egos, like this garden fence, intentionally protecting the squash from the deer. Other fences are ones we erect in our minds. By parental or societal expectations, fences of fear that keep us on the straight and narrow, living as others expect us to, the comfortable, repetitive days. For what purpose? We all justify our decisions- to feed the family, save enough for retirement, pay for long term care insurance. What?! When did that become a priority? Take me out back and shoot me like the old dog. Some people really do love their jobs/careers. Many more pine for “what could have been”….if only they dared. To me, joie de vivre is that elusive emotion when you physically feel the door to your heart opening and a sunbeam is streaming out. You feel warm, elated, loved, accomplished….a myriad of emotions but always an outpouring….over the years I’ve had many moments of “joie de vivre” and many more, more frequently now that I am actively pursuing my passions and no longer work in corporate America. Sometimes it is a fleeting emotion of accomplishment, a beaming moment of joy, relief or wonder and or sometimes happiness for something monumental achieved: acquiring that college degree, completing a marathon, passing an exam of certification, successfully completing a search and rescue mission. Each time the heart acknowledges the joy with the shutters wide open, but then the shutters close, and the light streams through the slats, slightly less bright. And eventually the slats, close too. Then in a matter of minutes or days, you return to a new state of “normal” with the elusive emotion of ecstatic joy safely tucked away, back into the safe haven of a closed heart. For you it may be the birth of a child, the accomplishment of a dream, or something as simple as the mutual love shared between you and those you love. Other times it is the joy of simple, daily life. Since I stopped working a “regular job”, I play cards with my mom and sisters each week. We play through lunch and catch up on lives, laugh and try to beat mom who can count 5 decks. I feel a sense of “joie de vivre” in those days, but a more subtle leaking of warm sun beams from my heart, sneaking out the side window, like the sun shining in through the church stained glass windows. Tara inspires in me a joy to be outdoors, work hard and dare to adventure big. A couple new acquaintances truly have a “joie de vivre” - Angie at the bank with the huge beautiful smile that lights up her eyes and Julie, whom I liked on meeting a few months ago, who exudes friendly, happy energy. These beautiful ladies have an abundance of “joie de vivre” and My heart sings when I see them. So many people live in fear, misery, unhappiness. Mimi, If you have an abundance of “joie de vivre” it is because it is needed in this world, to bring joy and happiness to others or to live by example to make the world a brighter place. So, no, Mimi. You didn’t have too much, and it was not the cause of the crash. (It was a pot hole.) As one who spends a lot of time adventuring, sometimes shit happens. You dared to live your dream and the crash was a crash, but not because you had too much love for life. So, no, Mimi, you can’t have too much “joie de vivre”, it did not cause the crash. Yes Virginia there is a Santa Clause.